A Reader's Apology

Books have been my window to the world. They have helped me learn a language well,taught me about places,customs,cultures and peoples. More importantly,they shaped my ideals and convictions. What follows is my ode to some books that have profoundly influenced me.In no particular order.

Fountainhead, which taught me that the highest morality is to live by your convictions and sacrificing that is compromising your integrity.

"Throughout the centuries there were men who took first steps down new roads armed with nothing but their own vision."

"I could die for you but dont ask me to live for you" 

Catcher in the Rye for the portrayal of a frustrated individual. For showing me Salinger .

To kill a Mockingbird for reminding me of the simple pleasures of life. For telling me why we must stand by our convictions. As Atticus puts it " I must live with myself before I live with others".

1984 which painted a stark picture of what governments could mutate into if we are not vigilant enough.About how freedom is worth more than anything else. For painting a harrowing dystopia.

A brave New World which portays an utopia where there is no suffering, no guilt and where you live a life which you were literally created to do.It made me think if its worth compromising passion,emotions and freedom for pleasure and security. 

Dreams from my father for its honesty. For giving me an insight into the issue of racism and for making me ponder on the issues of origin and identity.

Lolita for the beauty of prose. For shwoing that a man cant help his sexual preferences and for showing how manipulative the "victim", at times, could be. it taught me to look at everything without prejudice.

O Jerusalem for teaching me empathy. Showing me how the will of a few men can shape a nation. 

Freedom at Midnight.for telling me more about my country, showing the Mahatma in his glory.  Making me love my country even more.

Selections from the Complete Works of Swami Vivekananda for the sheer inspiration it has provided me every time I turn to it . Showing the greatness of our land and the grand ideals which were conceived by our forefathers. For showing me that being spiritual does not mean compromising on logic or blindly adhering to tradition. Showing me to what lofty heights man's mind can soar. For Showing me The Man Himself. Of everything I have read so far, none can match this for sheer impact.

"Strength is life, weakness is death. Strength is felicity, life eternal, immortal. Weakness is constant strain and misery; weakness is death."

Lord of the Rings for the sheer wonder. If a man could conjure a whole world including peoples,histories and languages, there is no end to human creativity. 

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time for presenting a haroowing descent into madness and illustrating how simple it is to being the descent. Madness is just another way of thinking.

Neti Neti for the ethereal writing style. For the title. For portraying emptiness .

The Hannibal series for showing me that contradictions exist everywhere. That what we call madness is just another way of thinking. For the horror, intrigue and beauty(Yes Hannibal Rising).

The Harry Potter series for the countless hours of joy. For the magic in Rowling's prose. For all the madness, obsession and fun. For the 20 re reads of The Order of the Phoenix.

Sons of Fortune for being the first proper novel I read. For being unputdownable. Not a penny More Not a Penny Less for delight. Jeffery Archer for making me become even more interested in reading.

Jurrasic Park series for redefining edge the seat thriller. Never has a book scared me more. Michael Chrichton for kindling interest in technology. 

The Godfather for being a classic. For Vito Corleone. For the Mob. For Puzo. For " Ill make him an offer he cant refuse".

Shalmar the Clown for the magic. For the beauty of Prose. For the beautiful portrayal of Kashmir. Enchantress of Florence for the magic again. Rushdie never ceases to amaze. 

And more,many more, many many more.

Im pretty sure I have missed out a lot of books. And Im also sure that this post is long enough not to miss them :D 

A Few Good Men

Inspired by today's Hindu(Page five I guess)

Meet Mr Palpandi. A waiter at Alankar. You wouldn't care to give him a second glance. But he has been serving the city for 25 years and the Police plan to  to honour him. What has he done? Nothing mind blowing. He just happens to wear a khaki uniform and regulate traffic at Nanjappa Road junction whenever he is not on duty. On usual days, you can see him for about three hours in the afternoon and for three more in the evening.His reason:Soul Satisfaction, as he puts it.

This is dad's experience :

About a month ago, there was a traffic jam in Avinashi Road.Just when dad had turned off the engine and resigned himself to a  long wait, he saw the trafffic being cleared. Eager to see who it was who was doing this, he stepped out. A bunch of auto drivers from the nearest Auto stand had taken it upon themselves to clear the mess. Dad was impressed, told them as much and asked them why they were doing it. " Summa irukkara timela ethavathu help panlam la" one of them said.And apparently, this was not the first time they had done this.

This little city has such men of character.

The Moon Reaches Out

The moon reaches out
Caressing your face
Her soothing touch

The wind blows on you
Ruffling sliken strands
His boyish charm

The forests speak to you
A tongue intuitive,unlearnt
Of eternal truths

The birds sing for you
Flowers yearn for your touch
The grass waits to feel you

Rivulets to wash your pain
To make you whole again

Feel the ancient bond
Connecting you and her

In the womb of Nature
Rest awhile,rejuvenate
Find yourself.


P.S: Im not very happy with this one. Something which I cant lay my finger upon makes this incomplete.

Oskar Schindler

Schindler: I could have got more out. I could have got more. I don't know. If I'd just … I could have got more.

Stern: Oskar, there are eleven hundred people who are alive because of you. Look at them

Schindler: If I'd made more money … I threw away so much money. You have no idea. If I'd just …

Stern: There will be generations because of what you did.

Schindler: I didn't do enough!

Stern: You did so much.[Schindler looks at his car]

Schindler: This car. Goeth would have bought this car. Why did I keep the car? Ten people right there. Ten people. Ten more people.[Removing Nazi pin from lapel]

Schindler: This pin. Two people. This is gold. Two more people. He would have given me two for it, at least one. One more person. A person, Stern. For this. I could have gotten one more person … and I didn't! And I … I didn't!

What a man. What a movie.

Of moms and metal

Today I was singing Master of puppets.

Me: Your life burns faster

Mom:Obey your mother.

My mom knows  the song well enough to parody it.Shows how many times Ive played it  and how tolerant she is to what she calls "music with awful guitar tuning but great guitar playing"

The Spirit Carries On

Music by Dream Theater

Lyrics by John Petrucci

Nicholas:

Where did we come from, 

Why all we here? 

Where do we go when we die?

What lies beyond

And what lay before?

Is anything certain in life?

They say, "Life is too short,"

"The here and the now"

And "You're only given one shot"

But could there be more,

Have I lived before,

Or could this be all that we've got?

If I die tomorrow

I'd be all right

Because I believe

That after we're gone

The spirit carries on

I used to be frightened of dying

I used to think death was the end

But that was beforeI'm not scared anymore

I know that my soul will transcend

I may never find all the answers

I may never understand why

I may never prove

What I know to be true

But I know that I still have to try

If I die tomorrow

I'd be all right

Because I believe

That after we're gone

The spirit carries on

Victoria:

"Move on, be brave

Don't weep at my grave

Because I am no longer here

But please never let

Your memory of me disappear"

Nicholas:

Safe in the light that surrounds me

Free of the fear and the pain

My questioning mind

Has helped me to find

The meaning in my life again

Victoria's real

I finally feel

At peace with the girl in my dreams

And now that I'm here

It's perfectly clear

I found out what all of this means

If I die tomorrow

I'd be all right

Because I believe

That after we're gone

The spirit carries on

\m/

Lyrics .No words for these lines.

What are we really after?

The three meal eater with no appetite
The child who starving twice each day

The agnostic pretending to believe
The bloody, ignorant fanatic

The uncaring indifferent sweetheart
The introvert forced to socialise

The teetotaller who yearns to get high
The alcoholic thinking it will work out

The fitness freak hoping to prolong life
The mystic who hopes for afterlife

The nine-to-fiver in it for the dough
The coding freak, computer addict

The family man desperate for a divorce
The woman who stays on for the kids

The kid who wants to grow up
The midlifer who yearns to be young again

Contradictions, pretensions, delusions
What are we really after?
What makes a content life?

Why are blogs Dying?

What happened to good old blogging? Why are blogs dying?

Remember the time when we used to get excited every time we post something? Of checking our blogger dashboard to see if the blogs we follow have something new ? The simple joy on seeing a well written comment from a random blogger was so much that we would happily pay a return visit. Random blog surfing used to be very engaging.

Nowadays, I open my blogger account once in a blue moon to post new stuff and to remind myself that I blog for my own sake. During those rare visits, I force myself to have a look at the blog updates. I find that highly popular blogs update every other day whereas the little blogs, the ones I used to take so much pleasure in reading, are mostly dead.

Why bother with a blog when you can put a note on Facebook right? It automatically appears on the home page of hundreds of "friends". Moreover you can tag the people you know will like this note. Guaranteed eyeballs.

Its easier from the readers point of view as well. All he /she has to do is to click once to show he/she "likes" your writing. It eliminates the need to come up with sensible comments and feedback. Many even like notes with no clue of whats actually meant.

Is that all there is to writing? Posting on your wall, allowing the same people to read and getting "likes"? Where is the pleasure of dicovering new writers and new blogs? Where is the joy of mkaing your blog look exactly the way you want it to? What about the intrigue of not knowing who the person actually is , but getting to know them through his/her writing? Have we lost something?


This is what I feel . Do tell me you feel about this.Lets discuss.

Suicidal Tendencies?

Warning: Not reader friendly.

You’ve decided to do it. Life is impossible. Suicide is your way out. Fine—but before you kill yourself consider these facts: Suicide is not usually successful. You think you know a guaranteed way? Ask the 25-year-old who tried to electrocute himself. He lived. But, both his arms are gone. What about jumping? Ask John. He used to be intelligent , with an engaging sense of humor. That was before he leapt from a building. Now, he’s brain-damaged and will always need care. He staggers and has seizures. He lives in a fog. But, worst of all, he KNOWS he used to be normal. What about pills? Ask the 12-year-old with extensive liver damage from an overdose. Have you ever seen anyone die of liver damage? You turn yellow. It’s a hard way to go. What about a gun? Ask the 24-year-old who shot himself in the head. Now he drags one leg, has a useless arm and has no vision or hearing on one side. He lived through his “foolproof” suicide. You might too. But…Who will clean your blood off the carpet or scrape your brains from the ceiling? Commercial cleaning companies may refuse that job- -but SOMEONE has to do it. Who will have to cut you down from where you hung yourself or identify your bloated body after you’ve drowned? Your father? Your mother? Your wife? Your son? The carefully worded “loving” suicide note is of no help. Those who loved you will NEVER completely recover. They’ll feel regret and an unending pain. Suicide is contagious. Look around your family. Look closely at the 4 year old playing with his cars on the rug. Kill yourself tonight, and he may do it ten years from now. You DO have other choices. There are people who can help you through this crisis. Call a hotline. Call a friend. Call your minister or priest. Call a doctor or hospital. Call the police.They will tell you that there’s hope. Maybe you’ll find it in the mail tomorrow. Or in a phone call this weekend. But what you’re seeking could be just a minute, a month, or a day away.You say you don’t want to be stopped? Still want to do it?Well, then, I may see you in the psychiatric ward later.And we’ll work with whatever you have left.

Of Intentions and Gifting

To get above it all
To where money reduces to mere numbers
And it is not monetary value
Or desire for approval
Or fear of ridicule
But the intention that counts
When you gift and recieve

Comments *cough*

On every Music Video on YouTube

1) “This is the best song in the history of mankind.”

2) “ *insert artist * is GOD “

3) “This sucks .If you want real music listen to Justin Beiber or Lady Gaga.”
A huge volley of swearing in return.

4) “I so hate the music scene of today. Its all filled with pretenders and emo kids. Real music was made by Pink Floyd Led Zep etc or*insert metal band name*. Im only fifteen and I know all this. No one in my school even hears them.”(so can someone say how cool I am please?)

5) Hip hop/rap vs metal/hard rock debate (Swearing match)

6) Some rank amateur trying to talk technical and getting owned. “ The lead guitar would sound much better tuned 12 octaves down”.

7) One or two sane comments which are usually liked the most.(proving that sanity still exists)

Maya Swirling

Many have always thought, no believed, that gender does not influence who you are. You are more than that. You are a person. At the most basic level, a person tends to make sense of himself, to define himself by external means.Your gender, the way you look, your family and place in society, language, politics, the people around you, what they believe in, your role models, what others see you as and so on. You get stuck in cliches and stereotypes, thinking that to be bound within these crude frames is integrity, honesty to your ideals. You wilfully cage yourself in this mesh .Incongruities are ignored for the inconvinence they cause to your notion of yourself. Your actions are based on and motivated by external sources and not by what you think or what you want.And thus stepping on what you think is soild ground you find yourself sinking into a quagmire. Contradictions become so prevalent that you stop thinking about all this, bundling it into a single sentence" Philosophy. Who needs it? ".Thus does the temptress work. Taunting ,luring, seducing,enmeshing you in her web of deceit. Her sting numbs your soul.You become just another person out there,a cogs spinning endlessly.




You does not mean you literally*

Not light reading i know*

Bach

Read Bridge Across forever by Richard Bach a few weeks back. It was Ritu who got me back into Bach. There are some beautiful quotes Id like you to see:
       
     *Has it ever happened, you’ve seen a striking film, beautifully written and acted and photographed, that   you walk out of the theater glad to be a human being and you say to yourself I hope they make a lot of money from that? I hope the actors, I hope the director earns a million dollars for what they’ve done, what they’ve given me tonight? And you go back and see the movie again and you’re happy to be a tiny part of the system that is rewarding those people with every ticket...the actors I see on the screen, they’ll get twenty cents of this very dollar I’m paying now; they’ll be able to buy an ice cream cone any flavor they want from their share of my ticket alone. Glorious moments in art in books and films and dance, they’re delicious because we see ourselves in glory’s mirror.

* Learning is finding out what you already know.
Doing is demonstrating that you know it.
Teaching is reminding others that they know just as well as you.
You are all learners, doers and teachers


* Your friends will know you better in the first minute you meet than your acquaintances will know you in a thousand years.

* You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it true. You may have to work for it, however.


* What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.


* If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, I guess you do have a problem.


* I’m here not because I am supposed to be here, or because I’m trapped here, but because I’d rather be with you than anywhere else in the world.

* Here is a test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: If you´re alive it isn´t.


*If our friendship depends on things like space and time, then when we finally overcome space and time, we've destroyed our own brotherhood! But overcome space, and all we have left is Here. Overcome time, and all we have left is Now. And in the middle of Here and Now, don't you think that we might see each other once or twice?


*There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its
hands. You seek problems because you need their gifts.


* Believe you know all the answers, and you know all the answers. Believe you're a master, and you are.

Its been ages since Ive written original stuff.I know. :(

Wilde

When I Googled Oscar Wilde by some random impulse, I found this:

"Yet each man kills the thing he loves
By each let this be heard,
Some do it with a bitter look,
Some with a flattering word,
The coward does it with a kiss,
The brave man with a sword!"

And this:

"All trials are trials for one's life, just as all sentences are sentences of death; and three times have I been tried. The first time I left the box to be arrested, the second time to be led back to the house of detention, the third time to pass into a prison for two years. Society, as we have constituted it, will have no place for me, has none to offer; but Nature, whose sweet rains fall on unjust and just alike, will have clefts in the rocks where I may hide, and secret valleys in whose silence I may weep undisturbed. She will hang the night with stars so that I may walk abroad in the darkness without stumbling, and send the wind over my footprints so that none may track me to my hurt: she will cleanse me in great waters, and with bitter herbs make me whole."--"De Profundis"

........no words for it.

Earth Hour Poem

Many gaze at the oceans
Admire lush forests
The majesty of tigers
And the glory of nature

They lament
The sad plight of dolphins
The massacre of whales
The destruction of coral reefs

Many wax eloquent
On the folly of Man
On his indifference
On his passive cruelty

Hold on! stop.

Are you not Man too?
Does not this responsibility
Lie equally on your shoulders?

Is it not time that we stopped vain chatter
And the lament of widows?

Stand up. Be a Man.
And being such
Take what comes with it.

We don’t need hollow voices
Enough has been said already
True work lies in the doing

Start with the Man in the Mirror
If you want to make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and make a change.

I wrote this for the poetry slam at Atmos today for earth hour. Couldn't make it there. Thanks to Madhu and her cousin Ram for getting it read!

Dewdrops

Sometimes it’s the really simple things you feel like doing .The ones which bring a smile to your face.

•    Like lazing around on your bed, listening to Billie Jean.

•    Getting totally engrossed in a novel forgetting the world around you.

•    Having a long conversation with someone you enjoy talking to, with whom you share a warm, comfortable rapport. It’s something as comfortable as curling up on your favourite bed.

•    Letting your head meander, following vague streams of thought and soliloquising; a memory that brings a smile to your face. 

•    Writing something just because you feel like doing it.

•    Having a sumptuous dinner at home, relishing every morsel.

•    Sleep for at least eight hours at night. No staying up just for the sake of it.      

•    Getting up with a smile on your face ready to face Amrita.

•    To be able to say, as Calvin puts it, "Here I am, happy and content ".

For I Am

Warning : May not be very reader friendly. But then again, my stuff never has been.

As usual, I've took a hiatus from posting. This was one of those times when nothing goes your way. In short, you get screwed by life.College messed me up, had a conflict with mom and dad, friends suspected me, Badminton Racquet got smashed, Ipod crashed, Phone got confiscated by college , My gym membership was stopped by mom and dad .My head started asking questions it had no business asking " Why am I doing CSE Engineering?", "Why engineering", "Is it too late to swap?"  etc. I realised how arrogant I sounded in my writing. Truckloads of shit happened. As usual, reading Vivekananda, Swami, and my cousin kept me sane.

These were things I defined myself by. When all these were gone, I realised, that I still am. That I am more than a combination of my interests and relationships. I am more . I just am.

The point is, with these things happening posting was the last thought on my head. And my writing tool happens to be my Mobile phone. With that gone, I feel like a cripple. I had 10 pieces written in it. Damn.

Anyway, things are starting to look up now.Almost all issues I had with people around me are resolved.Gonna get a mobile today. Finally.Did pretty well in recent quizzes. And looking forward to a lot more.

Have a lot of books piled up on my shelf.

1) Dr Zhivago

2) Catcher in the Rye

3) Parthiban's Dream

4) Sophie's world.

5) The Prize

6)A spot of bother

7) The Journey of a master 

Aand so many more. Too lazy to type. Movies too.

Anyway I almost normal now. I guess I'll start posting more frequently. My cousin, a sound engineer cum composer, has recorded a few of my poems .Will put them up soon.

"Life goes on.I'll sleep when I die.Bring it on."

Kick Start Coimbatore

A few of us are launching a site for coimbatore( Namma Ooru). THis is not another directory listing site or a news coverage site. This is crazy. Irreverent.In your face.For us,  by us.

We are not going to beat around the bush. Your question is, "Dude what are you going to offer me"? To which we reply- Coimbatore in a whole new light. A LOT of people complain that there isn’t much to do and that they are floating in boredom.If you are one among them asking what has Coimbatore to offer me,this is the place for you!
We tell you about the happening things and places ,about the cool clubs we have .We give you sneak previews of whats coming up in cbe.We tell you what are the best places to hang out(Yes).
We will introduce you to the people, we are going to get you closer to everyone around you, and not through scraps and poring through friends lists.There are hundreds that share your interests, hundreds who have no interests, hundreds who are searching for interests and thousands of other people, who you just might like.We will bring them closer to you.
We are launching a web site shortly. This is a preview. have a look and get back to us. Send in feedback be it roses or brickbats.Tell us what you want to see in there.

Carpe Diem

Laugh all you want. I am gonna take a resolution. One resolution. No, its not "Im gonna be good to mommy this year" or "Im gonna work out this year". Its something much simpler, something more.Two words. Latin. You know it .Carpe Diem. Yeah CARPE DIEM BABY!

A sudden connection over facebook, a sudden high, a new zeal for life. Poetry to usher in the year.

Carpe Diem

Inching closer to a new beginning,
A new dawn,
Feel the change
Palpable in the air.

High hopes,aims, dreams and aspirations,
Of promises kept and words broken,
Success and yet failure too

Every moment,every breath drawn
Carpe Diem pounding true.

Carpe Diem.Latin
"seize the day"
Take it by the throat
Capture it
Make it yours

Squeeze what what you can
Demand and get what you want
Go for it!

Yes CARPE DIEM!
For the whole damn year!
No matter who, what, when or why.

Life king size
For what you hold true
Life the way life
One given to few

You exist for yourself
You are your own proof
You are the witness to you life
The judge,jury and Holder of the Scale

Go sqeeze and suck each day
Wear out your shoes
Tread new paths
Do something, anything
Be true to you.

Yes.I mean it. Anyone sees me backing out on it, kick me in the butt and remind me.