All that he ever could be,he was

What if  a person can be all that he/she ever wants to?What if all your dreams can be intertwined to be the one driving force of your existence?What if these would define who you are,be your  epitaph when you pass away,and linger on as your legacy?This what I'm thinking of right now.

I want to work for India,but I am not the kind of guy who can live in villages and serve.I like to write.I'd like to be an entrepreneur of some sort.Since I'm doing my Computer Science Engineering I'd like to make an impact there as well. I would love my life to be in the company of people who are not afraid to use their brains,who are comfortable with who they are,who do not tread the trodden path,"who go instead  where there is no path and leave behind a trail" . I would not want even an ounce of my potential to be unrealised. It must be said that "All he ever could be, he was"[my quote].

What it all came together like pieces in a jigsaw puzzle,everything integrating to one glorious whole.A mixture of inspiration,passion,the right company,creativity,logic and independence.What if dreams were for real?

Reality

Am I getting illusions of grandeur? Delusions of self importance? Face the facts old man. You are redundant in today's world . Sure,you were a mover and shaker in your prime, the world paid rapt attention to your every word,limelight hogged your every move.

Heads of government ate out of your hands. But now the mantle has passed. The legacy remains, not the power. It is the legend they pay respect to, it is but a show. You are but a figure head, the face of the cause, a cause which has surged ahead, leaving you behind, impotent vulnerable.


The strings have slipped from your hands, the puppets now dance to their own fiddle. What you have is, at the most, a respect for what was not for what is. Face up old man.Your values are outmoded;dead values. You are dead to them;like a Che in contemporary culture.

It's over.

Integrity

She refused cash
He refused to call
With a lamb's pride
She said go ahead
Man of integrity
He kept his word
Her little courage
Began to wither
Bravery to begging
Son please answer me
Sensing weakness
He steps up the demand
A shared account
She shudders

Squeezed mercilessly
Between love and integrity
Integrity which refuses
To destroy by caving in
For him she must be strong
She must prevent character suicide

This she knows
But her courage
Is that of a lamb

On seeing the knife
He brandishes
Threatening to stab
Her forevermore
Prometheus and the eagle

She caves in
Cash in hand
Black at heart
He dumps her

So long mother
What started with balance
Lost balance
Lost. 

Within

Declare me a lunatic
Straitjacket my cloth
Bury me deep
Within bowels of thought.

Llock me in
Free from sin
Never do I cease
Relentless beast within

Emotions are pawns
Free the king bound
Rethrone the kingdom of the mind
Throw open dungeons of the heart

How ever you deny
Im the reality within
For what is man
But beast beneath skin

I will occupy
Ii will help you die
I will run through you
Now i rule you too
Sad but true [:D]

The last stanza is Metallica I admit.Suited perfectly though.[:D]

On Fast Forward

I want life to be a blur of activity;one event followed by another,in such a way that I'm totally occupied.In other words life in Realtime.


And if Time ever slows down,when seconds seem like minutes and moments tend to eternity,I'd like it to be with close friends and family around . It has been that way so far since Amrita happened to me[:D],life revolving around fulcrums of college,cqc,movies ,music and badminton.

I'm content with this state of affairs,so much so ,that I'd like like to continue at this hectic pace.I do not want time to slow down when all alone,to be trapped within the confines of my own head.I do know ,that this cant go on forever, that sooner or later, I would find myself in the vacuum I so desperately wish to avoid.

Some people say that if you have a spotless mind you will be at peace with yourself.Wonder what guilt lies embedded in me.I guess I must devise ways to entertain myself;to find my ruling passion;above all to love my own company.After all its the only one that stays.

Looking for :The Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind

Colllege and stuff

Sorry for the long hiatus. The last two months, I’ve been living a typical college goers life;  watch a series  (House season 1&2) , catch up with a favorite sport (Badminton) , watch every decent movie that hits  town and download the ones that don’t ,  have a lot of unfinished novels , catch up with a band’s discography( Metallica\m/),  keep in touch with friends old and new and live the good life. Oh and I’ve been quizzing too. I’ve been religiously attending every meeting of The Coimbatore QuizCircle and participating in every quiz I can. I made the finals in the last two I attended, something I never dreamt of doing in the first year. One I missed the third by five points and the other I ended up with a minus fifteen. Two sides of the coin. You miss some and you mess some. :D

College has not been as bad as I thought .Yes the travel is almost two hours each day. But have an Ipod and learn to conk off on a bus, you wont even feel it. My poor senior wakes me up when I reach. Yes, the time left to you each day is short. But I get around that by sleeping late and sleeping on the bus. And I’ve been literally running to the bus stand each day.

The best thing about my college is, there is nothing to be learnt by rote. Compared to other colleges our record and assignments are nothing. I see arts people writing more than we do. Concepts rule. This actually suits me fine. The amount of work you put is entirely up to you. A few hours of effort before periodicals and I can manage thirties. But it does get tiring at times. At other times you get sick of it all. Then starts the countdown to the nearest holiday.

However good my college is, I can never survive without holidays in between to recharge my batteries. Only after a week of college do you truly realize the value of the precious twenty four or forty eight hours left to you. I try to optimise fun to the maximum. I wake up really late, read two paper, end to end, slowly sipping a glass of warm milk. Then comes House time. I watch an episode or two, then snuggle and catch up on the week’s sleep. However well you sleep on the bus, at the end of a week, you are bound to be tired. After waking up it’s one of Badminton/Movie/ CQC. Then comes novel time. I read a hundred or so pages of some book. Then I talk on the phone and go to sleep reluctantly, knowing the next day I’d be in college. I have managed to stay in contact with most of my friends and we make it a point to meet every week. I am truly thankful to God that the people who matter are still close to me.  Bonds are stronger than ever.

All in all I am totally happy with the way me life is now.

Music:                   Metallica

Movies:                 Sin City, Scent of a woman , Silence of the lambs, Frost Nixon, LOTR,

                             Dil Chata Hai, Godfather 1,2,3(I still cannot         believe that an actor as

                              amazing as Al Pacino can actually exist)  

           

Novels Unfinished: Shalimar the Clown, Sophie’s world,           Hitchhikers       Guide to the Galaxy  , Quantum, The Lost Symbol

Serial:                    House MD Season 1&2

Quizzing:                CQC meetings, Resilience and Krusade Finals

Life :                     Good

College:               Satisfactory 

Friends :              Still in good touch

THE SPEECH THAT NEVER WAS

First, the background story. In 11th grade, I saw a truly awful Republic Day speech being rehearsed. The same speech which has been used for seven odd years and,I suspect,will be used for seven more ,was dusted off the rack and touched up in a  bad way. Since I could not take it, I wrote an alternate speech and presented it to my English mam.It was not accepted  because it was deemed "too harsh".Here is the speech.

"Fellow countrymen ,it gives me great pleasure to address you on the 21,152nd day of our Republic. The presence of this august gathering, comprising of our Principal,our Vice principal ,staff and the torchbearers our  generation gives me added pleasure and joy.

Each year,it is a tradition to speak of our past glory,the gallant exploits of our freedom fighters and our country as a developing nation. How long are we to rest on our past laurels, content with the tag"developing nation"? The previous two generations have distinguished themselves by  freeing us from the shackles of oppression and  putting us on the path of socio-economic development. If  we rest on their laurels and fail to act, we will be remembered as the first generation,  post independence , to have not been of service to the nation.

As John F Kennedy, former president of The United States of America , once said "Ask not what your country can do for you.Ask instead,what you can do for your country." We have the bane of indifference. How does this bother me?" is the  first question asked . This must change. The  poison of pessimism coursing  through  our veins must be replaced with life giving Hope.

There is only so much a government can do in a democratic country. It can implement reforms, make broad changes. It is up to us to be discerning and dynamic.

Technology is the pride of our nation. This has to reach everyone in every part of the country. Village knowledge centers must be set up in every village in India. A large number of companies  have come forward to  back this ambitious venture. The Tatas ,proud owners of Corus  and the inventors of the nano, RIl , Microsoft and many more  have pledged their support.

May more things have to be done. Merely saying that one person cant change anything is  pure escapism. "The history of the world is the history of a few men who dared to have faith in themselves" said Swami Vivekananda. Those who examine history will find this to be true.

It was one man who inspired the non-violence movement; it was one man who founded the Indian National Army; it was one man who went to the west and proclaimed the glory of Vedanta;it was one man who founded our glorious institution which now has 125 centres around the world.

Let us have the courage to follow our dreams. Let us dare to hope. Most of all ,let us be proud of  our Motherland  and endeavour to be worthy of being an Indian.let us have a happy Republic Day.Thank you."